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News Letter Update 4 August 5th 2025

Dear internet, OK WOAH you guys are so sweet! I'm so happy to hear you're all enjoying the new add-ons and modifications I've been making! Lets start off this week with some fun romance

Husband of the Week

I'm playing for you all my favorite song from Studio Ghibli. Jaime is yet to know it, but her future son-in-law is the main magician in this movie — HOWL. Here's some photos of my husband:

Howl

I know what you're thinking: Jr, he's a drawing. He's digital. He's just pixels, a fantasy, a flicker of light on a screen. And to that I say: SO WHAT?!

I am just a collection of carbon-based atoms, chaotically stuck together by electromagnetic forces, animated for a brief blip of time on a rock that's spinning through the cold, uncaring dark at 67,000 miles per hour.

My thoughts?

Static discharges in meat jelly.

My feelings?

Biochemical soup sloshing around in a skull bucket.

My very existence?

A cosmic coincidence born of stardust and statistical luck.

So you’re telling me I shouldn’t have a crush on a fictional character?

Why not?

EVERYTHING IS FICTION EVENTUALLY.

In a universe where stars are born only to burn out, where galaxies collide and die in silence, where time itself will eventually shudder to a stop—

you’re telling me my heart fluttering at some digital boy’s smile matters less than anything else?

NO.

It matters exactly as much as anything else:

which is to say, almost nothing—

but not nothing.

So let me long.

Let me yearn.

Let me whisper sweet nothings into the great cosmic vacuum.

Because in this vast and uncaring universe, where meaning is fleeting and fate is a joke—

LET ME HAVE MY CRUSH.

Let me feel something.

Even if he’s made of pixels...

Mom I swear this is just me bring dramatic I will bring home a actual husband or wife for your grandkids at some point and will not marry a cardboard cut out of a anime man

So my last day at the library was today. I put in my two weeks' notice and am saying goodbye to my lovely spot in the library. FEAR NOT—even though this newsletter updates via stolen public library Wi-Fi, me quitting will hurt NOTHING. I still plan to bring you top-tier comedy that keeps my hands busy so I don't commit grand larceny. (Note to self: look up what grand larceny is.)

Because of this sudden deviation from a work-based life, I will have some more ME time! I plan on getting into my plushies so I'll post them here! And if you want one, I'll probably let my lovely newsletter people make their first offers for adoption. Here's a pic of what you guys might be able to expect—and yes, those are teeth.

Beast

Talking about money, I did in fact receive an endorsement for this week's update! One of my friends kindly offered it after I told them I was considering sponsorships. They told me they needed new members for their "organization." So thank you to Not A Cult for today's sponsorship.

Click here for our exciting interview with Not a Cult Leader N.A.C Leader Talon Taylor Book Nook

Molly Ostertag

Today im reviewing Epithet Erased Prision of Plastic ok lets start off with a disclaimer the author of this book was in the middle of some anime discourse after breaking some rules and also being a general douche bag SO I want to clarify I do not condone his behavior or praise him in anyway BUT I loved the book and so many other amazing people put genuine effort into this work that I want to review it anyways.

Now the story behind the book is genuinely very interesting it was a youtube series before they condenced the rest of the series into a book so we could continue enjoying the story line AND the audio book brings back all the original voice actors which is PERFECT

I havent bought the audio book yet, I have suggested it to my library but we got the PHYSICAL BOOK Thanks Albion Fam for lending it to me

This book is a work of art, genuinely it holds so many facets of beauty the art within the pages, the delicate tone to the writting and the beautiful story line with wonderfully goofy characters.

I am doing my best not to divulge into a speech about my love for Giovanni Potage so heres a description of the book if you like it you can buy it online, physical or audio and you can try to check it out of your local library too!

Artist Alley

Ezra Sorria he/him - Bulgarian

Callies Art

The Unlucky Cat Studio is an online shop for Callie's wonderful art! It includes merch, their personal paintings, and the joyful web design whimsy I hope my newsletter brings you all.

Callie has been a long-time mentor and close friend. I hope you'll give their splendid art a look, and as a limited-time offer, the first person to send me proof of a purchase of any type will receive a free sponsored segment on this newsletter to use as you wish (assuming it follows the conventions of Neocities guidelines) Email your recipt or screenshot of purchase to Juniornewsupdate@gmail.com.

If we play our cards right, maybe one day we can snag an interview from this splendid artist, dear readers!

Visit The Unlucky Cat Studios!

Juniors Closet

I decided I will be calling my outfit speculations Juniors Closet. Maybe it will inspire some of your next outfits.

Clothes

Ok, so this closet is all about this style I saw online that I like to call 10-year-old homeless skater boy. Now, I like the pockets; I think having that kind of inventory space is essential, BUT if you know me IRL, you know I BARELY show my legs. I think I've worn shorts to school twice in the last 4 years. Being exposed like that makes me think of my imaginary friend who was a nun and told me if I wore short socks, I was a harlet and wouldn’t go to heaven. I think I’ll try some experimentation with this at some point. I enjoy the laid-back masculinity with refined and paired accessorizing. This outfit also usually pairs with nice shoes, usually longer-tied shoes, most with thicker bases. I think if you enjoy the relaxed but pointed look, this would be excellent for you.

Closing Statement

PHEW woah WOAH, that was ALOT. I hope you liked this tons guys this took a little longer then usual but thats because I want to MAKE this something you can look at and be proud to have subscribed to! I love you all so much I hope you enjoyed this I know I have. Thank you for reading and if you havent yet plug in your email at the bottom for email updates on my letters!

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Comments Section!!!

"Merry Go Round of Life By Studio Ghibli"

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